Ten Tips: Tackling Nosey Questions
- Go with your gut: if your head & heart tell you not to answer, trust them
- Don’t be rude back: “How dare you ask me….” or turn the question back to them “So what’s your love life like?
- Use “I” statements
- Find out more if appropriate: “I’m interested to know why you’re asking?’, ‘How did you hear about that?’ Then decide if you want to answer
- Say how you feel “I’m surprised to be asked …..” or “I feel awkward talking about ….”
- Depersonalise your answer: ‘I don’t like saying my age’ or “I don’t discuss personal issues/religion/politics at work”
- If they press for answer say “I’m feeling pressured to answer and I’ve already said….”
- If they still press, say “I’d like to change the subject.”
- Sometimes a little, light humour will suffice: “How old are you?” “I feel young” or “I don’t remember!”
- Finally, don’t let guilt force you into returning to the subject & giving away your secrets
Sensitive information
Some questions are of a more sensitive nature. Someone close may want to know what you are writing, where you are going, about your health or wealth! There will be times when you choose privacy. “Thank you for asking. I’d prefer not to go into it and would be grateful if you’d respect that”. There is a delicate balance here when both parties have genuine needs. Respect their enquiry as well as your needs, don’t bow to pressure & then regret. There may be a later time when you’re happy to share it.
Click here for more information about difficult people – and how to deal with them with confidence and assertiveness.
